Growing up I was often critiqued for being simple, plain, boring. The women around me were bold, and leaned more into the glamour aspect in their fashion choices. Keeping the voices of their personal style often left me confused. Even more confusing, is when you do take their advise, then go out and get compliments, affirming their beliefs.
…But the some of the hallmarks of this here blog is authenticity and confidence, so let’s rewire that belief for the both of us RIGHT NOW.
Night out at a Birthday Dinner
You could get compliments in sackcloth. You are beautiful, a baddie, and clothes don’t make you. You make clothes.
Whenever a person gives a compliment we don’t realize they are often not just complimenting the article of clothing. They may be complimenting your confidence, the color of the clothing, the form of style or the figure of the person wearing it. That is why a dress on one person can get more compliments than that same dress on another. A lot of underlying messages go into one compliment; this is why it is best to find your personal style and what suits YOU. This calls your confidence and comfort front and center.
I love to see people who show up in their best fit. Seeing everyone’s unique take on how to interpret an event. Every friendship meet up can be a met gala event if we stick to our authentic self. One thing I am keen on when picking friends, are those who think for themselves and secondly allow others to do the same. It is a beautiful often overlooked quality!
Knowing your personal style makes shopping less daunting. You are able to refer to what you are most drawn to and create from your greatest inspiration, YOURSELF! You end up asking yourself deep questions such as, what do I want to wear, and how do I want to show up in the world. You don’t get to do this with fast fashions. Most times, with fast fashions- you’ve seen the dress or item so many times that you think you like it because our brains are impressionable. Or- the outfit looked good on another person so you purchase. This doesn’t necessarily mean the outfit will look good or compliment you. No hate on fast fashion, but knowing your personal style helps you navigate the the things you spend your money on. The fashion choices needs to make sense! Life is much more fulfilling when everything is about you and you can show up as such, intentionally. You get the opportunity to communicate who you are, not how you are.
You’ll find, that you wear what makes you most confident and comfortable and still get compliments.
How to find your personal style? Here are some of the tools I used to discover my fashion personality:
Pinterest is my holy grail. I love how personal this application is. It is social media- without the social. After a while of making boards, pinning, and searching for certain things you can take a look at your Pinterest feed and gage your personal style, even look back at some of your boards, what is the recurring theme? That is you. That is what you like and who you are.
Cosmopolitan always has a style guide or cute personality/style quiz. This is a helpful/confirming tool to gage what you like. Even if you cannot find a quiz on that site, google, Chat GPT there are so many resources to find style quizzes. You cannot fail this quiz. It is a test about you. This should be the first step to discover your style, after a couple of test, you may find a common result that you lean more toward.
I also follow Kelsey on tik tok and she introduced me to the Feminine Archetype Quiz. Your Feminine Archetype is essentially distinct expressions of personal style based on your personality and choices and how you show up in the world. I’d say this quiz helps you find your je ne sais quoi. This test dives a bit deeper tha a random style quiz on google as the Feminine Archetype is based on a Jungian study. And goes much deeper than just personal style. You can check out the the study and work on Women Love Power.
I took the test a about a year ago (the exam is about 150 questions roughly) But I could not find my results to compare, so I re-took the quiz, and my results reflected my current Pinterest feed. My top three being **The Lover, The Mother and the Sage. I don’t remember if the lover was part of mine the last time I took it but I know the mother and the sage were. So I know those two are very close to my archetype. When I look at them, they incorporate the timeless, minimalistic yet chic aesthetic I was always drawn to as a child!
I heard someone say, “finding your personal style is like finding your personal super power.” I agree. It guides the way you step into the world. It even helps you attract likeminded people. You also understand others outside of you a bit better. For my closest friends, I can pick out accessories and pieces that I know they’d love based knowing who they are and understanding their personal style.
Your personal style is your personal project.
